A roadmap for guys — and the people who love them — to face cancer with an open heart and a warrior spirit
My name is Trevor Maxwell. I’m a writer, husband, and father of two teenage daughters. Since March of 2018, I’ve been living with stage IV colon cancer.
The diagnosis shattered my sense of self and my roles in the world.
I needed help. I found it through connecting with other patients, in person and online. About 75 percent of the people I met were women patients, or women caregivers seeking guidance for their husbands, sons, and fathers.
Where were the men? They didn’t need help?
From what I learned, they absolutely did need help. Lots of it. They were just too proud, angry, ashamed, or depressed to seek it out. Early in my own journey, I was in that place, too. Unfortunately, isolation can lead to mental health problems, strained relationships, substance abuse, and poor medical outcomes.
That got the ball rolling for the Man Up to Cancer concept. My wife encouraged me. She said, you need to do something for the men. It will help them, and everyone in their lives. So I developed some guiding principles:
- DON’T CHECK OUT. Take action and resist the instinct to withdraw.
- BRING YOUR FIERCE HEART. If you lack toughness, cultivate your inner badass. If you’re too macho, cultivate your loving nature.
- PAY IT FORWARD. Accept help and give back to others.
I want to let men patients, and the people who care about them, know they never have to face this alone. And that sometimes, “Manning Up” means reaching out, instead of keeping it all in.
I’m exploring these principles and other themes in the content I’m developing for my website and book, which I intend to launch this year. To stay tuned, you can follow the mission at www.facebook.com/cancerwolves.
You’ll see wolves at the center of the Man Up to Cancer identity. If one wolf is sick or injured, others guard him and encourage him toward health. If the wolf dies, others are there to provide kinship.
We need to be wolves for one another.
P.S. If you want to learn more, or to discuss potential partnerships, I’d love to hear from you. Email me at email@example.com. I also invite you to follow my blog and connect with me on Facebook, Twitter, and LinkedIn.